Hey guys, its Alicia here (AKA Aliki). So the MET Gala was on Tuesday (Aus time, Monday in 'merica) and it is honestly my favourite red carpet event of the year!
This years MET Gala theme was "Heavenly Bodies: Fashion and the Catholic Imagination". Catholicism is opulent, decedent and rich in art, architecture, tradition, symbolism, history and fables. I was so excited to see how designers and celebrities would interpret this theme and what they will be drawing inspiration from.
As celebrities were gracing the red carpet, my BFF Amelia (who you know as our resident makeup guru) and I were txting each other a running commentary of what we were seeing. Amelia as usual, was making me LOL with her witty remarks and her weird/clever habit of references people to objects. So I said "Hey Amela, why don't we turn this conversation into a blog post? I'm sure all our RM Blog readers and the rest of the internet are dying to hear our opinion on this years Met Gala". Because obviously we think we're freaking hilarious and important... But in all honesty, if you and your BFF don't think you're freaking hilarious and should have a reality TV show because everyone deserves to know how funny the two of you are, then are you even BFF's?
So without further ado.. Let's talk MET Gala!
Amal Clooney in Richard Quinn
Alicia: I love this look from the back. But from the front it's so confusing. I'm lost, I just don't get it. The colours and the cut of the pants don't work and the flowers on the bust look like a bit of vom... Why?
Amelia: This is incredibly underwhelming from someone who co-hosted the evening. I agree about the back. It’s gorgeous, Garden of Eden vibes to a tee and then she turns and it’s like, shit… they forgot to sew up the front and she had pants on while she was trying it on.. then one of the babies threw up on the other one and George was like AMAL I can’t handle this, you take them!! Then she’s like omg but babe I have that thing I’m hosting later tonight which I’m totally late for… and here we are, with an unfinished dress, Amal still wearing her pj pants and George realising last minute that he stuffed up when he didn’t look up from his phone when she asked ‘babe does this look ok?’. Married life.
Blake Lively in Versace
Alicia: I think everyone agrees that she did good. On theme, grand, gorgeous, sexy, everything a Met Gala gown should be.
Amelia: Blake KILLED IT. She looks like she stepped straight out of the stained glass window of a grand Cathedral. The train is amazing, her headpiece, the beautiful makeup, her husband. Her husband...
Jaden Smith in Louis Vuitton
Amelia: Classic Middle Child Syndrome. I’m here, I’m relevant, I’ve achieved something. Hey guys, Jesus is NOT the only icon, there’s another J in the house and he’s got his certificate of participation.
Alicia: Hahaha! But also, why did his parents let him leave the house with it? C'mon big Willy. Put your foot down!
Cara Delevingne in Dior
Alicia: She's a candle stick. Or a candelabra? You know the ones in the old cathedrals. And I also feel like she wouldn’t have broken character all night. I really appreciate the drama in this look.
Amelia: I would confess all my sins to her.
Cardi B in Moschino
Alicia: I actually like this. I’m only just starting to understand what a Cardi B is. I hadn’t heard of her until Alex danced for her at Coachella. I know, i’m so out of touch with pop culture. I really appreciate the beading detail and the headpiece BUT, would have been great if it had just a slightly higher neckline. Those baby mumma boobs could slip a nip any moment!
Amelia: I like her Angelina leg! But not too wide boo or that baby might fall out. Okrrr.
Cleo Wade in Gucci
Alicia: I love love LOVE this dress and the whole lewk! Is it on theme? Unclear. But is it really that off? I mean the cape gives off a kind of priestess vibe and the colours in the skirt bear resemblance to the stained glass windows of a Cathedral. Plus, she’s a poet/writer, so I kinda feel she probably has some deep meaning behind this look and why it ties in with the theme. Well that’s what i’m telling myself anyway.
Amelia: This bish took ethereal to the next level. I LOVE CLEO WADE. She is serving all those angelic garden vibes with that gorgeous natural face and you know she is going to shower you in love and positive affirmations. I also feel like her hair would smell like roses and feel like fairy floss. Love her.
Alicia: So does anyone actually know how old she is?
Amelia: I don’t know, I kind of love her.. scares the hell out of me but does no wrong in my eyes.
Alicia: She's an icon, that's for sure. Being Italian and a Versace automatically gives her theme browny points.
Rihanna in Maison Margiela by John Galliano
Alicia: To be honest, i’m not usually a fan of Ri Ri. But I LOVE this. She nailed it! All hail Pope RiRi.
Amelia: RIRI DID NOT COME TO PLAY WITH YALL. Bish came as the dang POPE. Then she did a themed video to showcase the outfit. A+++ and she gets extra credit for that video too.
Ariana Grande in Vera Wang
Alicia: LOVE! Another one of my favourite looks from the night! Is she literally wearing Michelangelo? Did they just pluck it down from the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel and drape it around her body? Can you imagine, the Catholic church must be livid with some of these interpretations of the “Catholic Imagination”. Haha! But this dress is so dreamy and heavenly.
Amelia: YASSSSS ARIANA. Yes to the Sistine Chapel on your little bod!! And that body oil too just shimmering in all the right places. But sis needs to retire that bow and winged eyeliner situation. Is it a bow on her head? Because if it is, RETIRE. IT. This is not your first album anymore.
Gigi Hadid in Versace
Alicia: Firstly, not on theme. Secondly I still don’t even like it as a dress. It looks like a figure skating costume
Amelia: No it’s on theme! She’s a window! I get it, I get it. And this photo does ZERO justice to the artwork that was her makeup. LAWD HAVE MERCY she served some good face.
Greta Gerwig in The Row
Alicia: I actually really like this. I call this look “Nun chic”
Amelia: Can’t fault it. Brief executed to a tee.
Jennifer Lopez in Balmain
Alicia: YES JLO! Love!
Amelia: jLo is that caliente sassy sin we just can’t look away from. Serving some serious quad muscle too, praise Mami.
Alicia: "Caliente" Ahh hahaha
Kate Bosworth in Oscar de la Renta
Alicia: She’s like the perfect little catholic bride. The Virgin Mary. And I'm a huge sucker for anything Oscar de la Renta.
Amelia: Obsessed with K-Bos and her perfect face. She has two different coloured eyes which could be construed as mildly demonic but I’ll leave that here..
Kate Moss in Saint Laurent
Alicia: She looks like she’s given up and is giving off major “CBF you all bore me” vibes. She reminds me of that SATC episode when that Lexi character falls out the window “No one’s fun anymore. What ever happened to fun? God. I’m so bored I could die”....
Amelia: Kate gives ZERO fcks. She legit looks like she just woke up, chucked on some wings from the dollar shop on and rocked up because she had to. The cut of that dress is horrendous, it looks like it was $15 from ICE.
Alicia: Actually! I definitely wore that dress to underage Academy (RIP) circa 2003.
Katy Perry in Versace
Alicia: Amazing! Love! And so on brand for Kat Per. I wonder if she wore the wings all night?
Amelia: I’m all about this EXCEPT for the boots. I hate thigh high boots that aren’t skin tight. It reminds me of a pair of horrendous black suede ones I got from Wittner ten years ago when I was trying to be a grown ass woman. Nah girl. The dress should have been floor length. Next time KP.
Alicia: Definitely agree that this would have looked much better with a floor length dress. But I just don't think that would be very Katy P. Her look has to be a bit quirky/awkward and like something just isn't quite right.
Kendall Jenner in Off White
Alicia: Snor!! We get it! You’re a babe and uber cool and “on fleek” or whatevs. But some creativity please. Its bloody MET Gala night!! And you're not on theme.
Alicia: Ahhh hahaha she does look like toilet paper! Sorry I retract my previous comment, maybe she’s meant to be the toilet paper the Pope wipes his arse with…
Kim Kardashian West in Gianni Versace
Amelia: Psalm 135:15-18
The idols of the nations are silver and gold, the work of human hands. They have mouths, but do not speak; they have eyes, but do not see; they have ears, but do not hear, nor is there any breath in their mouths. Those who make them become like them, so do all who trust in them!
So……...I think Kim’s designer made her a literal representation of a Bible psalm. Just taking the absolute piss out of her basically and reminding the public not to worship false idols. *Mic drop*
Alicia: OMG Amelia! Fuck yes!! I have nothing more to add. And I always have something to say when it comes to Kim K. Hallelujah! Praise the LAWD! Do not worship false idols!! DEAD!!
Amelia: Skrrrrrrrt….motorsport, put that thing in sport..
Ok 2 things here:
- I feel like Kylie might be dyslexic. She literally grabbed the car seat, put it on and was like ‘this looks so dope’. Catholic, honey. Not car seat.
- A not-so-subtle reminder that Ky & Travis had Stormi out of wedlock, so their mere presence is a representation of sin.
Alicia: If you're turning up to the Met Gala not in theme, you're probably Regina George at Halloween. Respect the theme! Respect the MET! And above all, show some damn respect to Anna!
Bella Hadid in Chrome Hearts
Alicia: Then Bella said to Kylie “If you’re a car seat, I’m a car seat!” They drove off into the sunset and lived happily ever after.
Amelia: Bella is the motorbike part of the Jenner-Scott-Hadid motorcade. Meanwhile the missing detail that we don’t see from this photo was a giant crucifix on the back of her leather cape and a stunning veil Jen Atkin SEWED into her hair. I loooooooved this whole look. Bella can take my soul and sew it into her veil for all I care. Obsessed.
Kris Jenner in Tommy Hillfiger
Amelia: You’re doing great, sweetie.
Alicia: Ha! She's such a stage mum. Does enough to stand out and be noticed, but would never take the spotlight from the girls.
Jared Leto & Lana Del Ray in Gucci
Alicia: Another one of my favourite looks of the night! How many times have I said that now? Jared is such a beautiful, perfect, Roman Catholic interpretation of Jesus. He wears that crown so well. I wonder if he was growing the facial hair specifically for this night? And Lana is giving off major Baz Luhrmann Romeo and Juliet vibes. How dramatic are all the daggers in her heart? So great.
Amelia: Jared Leto is just having so much fun with fashion the last couple of years and it’s amazing. He doesn’t age. He’s just so damn beautiful and the looks like the white-boy representation of Jesus that we see in all those paintings no?
Alicia: Exactly, because Jesus wasn't actually white.
Alicia: Definitely doesn’t want to be there. So much so that she's camouflaged with the carpet. But besides from that, I actually do like what she’s doing here. Except the hem of the dress reminds me of my Yiayias curtains in the formal sitting room.
Amelia: Ultimate Queen Anne vibes. Get it girl.
Madonna in Jean Paul Gaultier
Alicia: “When you call my name, it's like a little prayer”. If that's not the first thing that comes to your head when you see this, you must be 12. This theme was also made for Madonna. I don't think she's even dressing up, this is just another Monday for her.
Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen
Alicia: This doesn’t seem that far off how they usually dress. The looks a little more pagan priestess than Catholic to me.
Amelia: I love Michelle Tanner. I get some Moses vibes from Ashley but Mary Kate is like super lazy for me. I expected more from these bishes.
Selena Gomez in Coach
Amelia: I love Selena, it’s deep and it’s real but… first of all, why does she look so damn tired? Where is her contour? Why does she look like she forgot to rinse off her fresh tan? And WHY ARE HER TITTIES LOOKING SO SAGGY. No lo se Selenita, she needs our prayers.
Alicia: Nooo!! I think she looks like an adorable little cherub! I really hope that’s what she was going for. I love the little curly up do and bare looking, dewy makeup. I like that she doesn’t have contour for her little angelic, cherub baby face.
Sarah Jessica Parker in Dolce & Gabbana
Alicia: SJP lives for the MET. She's a MET veteran and goes hard every single year. And I look forward to seeing what she gonna do, every single year! Clearly, she never disappoints. She is a cathedral.
Amelia: You know SJP isn’t playing when she wears the damn Nativity scene on her head. She crazy and I like it.
Alicia: Another car seat?? Oh wait… is that supposed to be a giant vagina?
Amelia: I can’t. She looks like the Matrix and the Church rolled into the ‘hood, put on a durag and came out to fight you in the elevator.
Stella Maxwell in Moschino
Amelia: Saints for a religious theme, groundbreaking.
Alicia: I actually really love it! Another of my favourites from the night. The detail in this dress is just divine. It’s more groundbreaking than crosses.
Zendaya in Versace
Amelia: Probably my favourite look of the night. Little mama nailed it in her Joan of Arc costume.
Alicia: I’ll admit, at first I thought she was getting Game Of Thrones mixed up with the bible...But obviously that was me. I can't help it, I just have GOT on my mind at the mo. Seriously when is the next season coming out??
Any way, yes 1000 times to Zendaya. I love how different her look is to everyone else, even though she literally dressed up as a character from the bible. Definitely nailed this look and the theme and possibly even Jesus to his cross? Too far? Soz.
So anyway, here is probably a good place to wrap up, even though we could go on all night. What was your favourite MET Gala look and which looks did you hate!? Or just didn't get?
Hopefully you enjoyed this post and got a LOL or two out. If so, would you like to see us do more blogs like this one? And if you didn't like it, then probably just keep that to yourself ok thanks bye!!
Aliki (AKA Alicia) & Amelia